In January, I decided to start putting my own health and fitness at the forefront of my life. I've always been unhappy with myself and my body. Back all the way up to the 4th grade. I remember getting weighed at school and weigh 101 lbs. I was ashamed. I moved from Kansas to Tennessee, and I remember weighing myself in the 5th grade, and I was up to 130 lbs. Fast forward to the summer before 8th grade where I was up to 155 lbs. I lost 8 lbs over the summer and received comments from school staff members that I was "losing my baby fat." It was during my 8th grade year that I started making myself throw up. I didn't lose any more weight, but the summer before my 9th grade year, I starved myself. I counted calories and went from starting at 1200 to eating 800 then 500. That summer I starved my way down to 130 lbs.
I gained the weight back by the end of the school year, and during my junior year of high school, I moved to Kentucky and was back to 155 lbs. I still never gave up purging my food completely, and I had an extremely unhealthy relationship with food. Throughout the rest of high school, I would continue to try to lose weight in unhealthy ways, even resorting to cigarettes to curb my appetite. The summer before my freshman year of college I was determined to try and lose weight again. I was determined to not be "the fat roommate." Although I ended up losing some weight, and got down to the 140's, the summer changed me in ways that I never imagined. That summer was the summer that I made unhealthy choices for myself and my body. That summer I ended up getting pregnant and had a miscarriage. Of course, my relationship with my boyfriend, my body, and myself was not the same after that.
I ended college still in the 140's, lost a little weight, and started this year at 138.6. Despite the fact that I was only 8.6 pounds away from my lowest weight, I was unhappy with the way I looked and hated my body. Thus, I started this year determined to change that. I began to incorporate exercises and healthier eating into my life. In January, I began to run, and I was determined to run a half marathon. I'm proud to say that I ran my first half marathon on April 25th and finished in 2:09, and I have signed up for 2 more this year. With clean eating and exercise, I have gotten down to 131 lbs as of this morning. Although I have lost weight, I am still continuing to love my body and the amazing things it is able to do for me.
Thank you for joining me on my journey towards clean eating, living a healthy lifestyle, and learning to love myself.
